Wednesday, April 27, 2016
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
Friday, December 16, 2011
I was walking along Ste. Catherine Street yesterday, going to get my eyebrows waxed. When I reached the salon, there was a man standing alone in the doorway next door. He looked at me then at the invisible person next to him, pointed directly at me and said, "LOOK AT HER!" He looked at me again then back at his invisible friend and added "SHE THINKS SHE'S SATAN!!!" I need to start getting my eyebrows waxed more frequently.
Friday, September 9, 2011
A few years ago, I was driving to Vermont for the weekend. My older daughter and her friend were in the car, and so was my younger daughter. It was the middle of winter and my younger daughter, who was about six at the time, was looking forward to swimming in the indoor pool at the hotel. Though it was quite cold outside, the sun was strong and it was hot in the car. She was sitting directly in the sun in the back seat of the car squirming in discomfort. She said to us, "I can think of three reasons why I don't want to die today. One, I really want to go swimming today. Two, I don't want to get any closer to that sun than I have to, and three... wait, there are two reasons, not three."
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
When I was younger, I used to have a little Kellogg's Corn Flakes battery operated alarm clock. When it went off, the realistic sound of a rooster crowing jolted me awake. My father used to borrow it from time to time if he was going to have friends riding in the back seat of his car. He would put the clock in the trunk and set it to go off while they were riding in the car. When the friends questioned it, he would act all annoyed. "Oh damn, the rooster is loose in the trunk again".